Jokes!

Feel Free to add any Canadian or Canada vs. US jokes here

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from
 September through May,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

  If someone in a Home Depot store
 Offers you assistance and they don't work there,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

 If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time,
 You may live in Canada .. 
 

  If you've had a lengthy  telephone conversation
 With someone who dialed a wrong number,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

  If 'Vacation' means going anywhere
 South of Detroit for the weekend,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

  If you measure distance in hours,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

  If you know several people
 Who have hit a deer more than once,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

  If you have switched from 'heat' to 'A/C'
 In the same day and back again,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

  If you can drive 90 km/hr through 2 feet of snow
 During a raging blizzard without flinching,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

  If you install security lights on your house and   garage,
 But leave both unlocked,
 You may live in  Canada . 
 

  If you carry jumper cables in your car
 And your wife knows how to use them,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

  If you design your kid's Halloween costume
 To fit over a snowsuit,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

  If the speed limit on the highway is 80 km --
 You're going 95 and everybody is passing you,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

 If driving is better in the winter
 Because the potholes are filled with snow,
 You may live in Canada . 
 

 If you know all 4  seasons:
 Almost winter, winter, still winter,
 and road construction,
 You may live in Canada .   
 
 (this is my favourite, because how true) 
 
 If you have more  miles
 On your snow blower than your car,
 You may live in Canada . 
 
 If you  find -2 degrees 'a little chilly',
 You may live in Canada .